 |
| Through all the hullabaloo, I hadn't a chance to get to know Don any better. Whenever I had a moment I floated straight into his arms! continued on page 35 |
She fell in love with Don the instant she saw him. But she knew so little about him, and there wasn’t much time to find out ...
A CERTAIN IMPULSE By VIRGINIA LEE
ILLUSTRATED by WILLIAM ROSE
ILLUSTRATED by WILLIAM ROSE
AS far as I was concerned it was just another Saturday Country dance at the Club, with me twirling about with the usual partners. My blue nylon dress floated airily about me, the evening was soft as a dream, but something was missing, until I noticed the young man at Mr. and Mrs. Morgan’s table.
He had dark hair and a face that looked unbelievably handsome to my sidelong glances. He seemed about twenty-eight, was wide-shouldered and, I imagined, tall. He was tall. When he stood up, he danced first with Sally Jones and then with , Mrs, Morgan. He looked superb.
When the music stopped I saw him saying something to Mrs. Morgan and then they started across the room to me. The Morgans are newcomers who have belonged to the club for only six months, so we don't know them well, although Mother occasionally plays bridge with Mrs. Morgan.
His name, Mrs. Morgan said when she introduced us, was Donald Woodridge. He was their guest for the weekend and he would like to dance with me. He had a warm, easy smile, and standing beside him my head just reached his shoulders.
After Mrs. Morgan left us we stood there looking at each other.
Finally he said; "Well." Then he took a long, deep breath and said; "Well, well."
I don't know why he bothered to say anything else. He could do enough with that.
THEN he held out his arms and we began to dance. The later details escape me, such as where we were and whether there was a floor beneath our feet, I only knew that I was floating to the moon, falling magically in love.
At the end of the evening Don borrowed the Morgans' car and drove me home. But first we went up to the top of the hill, where you can see over the treetops, past the lights below, to the faint, glimmering outlines of London, We sat looking not at the view but at each other.
At last he took another exceedingly long breath and said, "Hallo"
I understood perfectly. . . .
The next morning about ten-thirty while I was eating a leisurely Sunday breakfast and Mother and Dad were inspecting the garden, Don appeared, He had actually grown more attractive in the few hours since I had seen him, I poured him a cup of coffee and asked him what he did.
"I’m a mining engineer," he said,
I thought that was interesting as I'd never known one before. I asked him where the mine was,
"Chile," he said.
"Chile," I, echoed happily. Then I jumped a little and cried, "Chile! But that's thousands of miles away!"
"Exactly," he said and leaned intensely across the table towards me, "and we haven't much time. I've been in England on leave and I'm due back in nineteen days."
If things had been moving rapidly before, they suddenly speeded up past an calculation. We sat staring at each other in consternation.
Then Don smiled his easy smile and said: "But don't worry, everything will work out all right."
He had taken a degree in engineering and was mad about his job. His parents had died and his nearest relative was an uncle in Birmingham, who was ill now and whom he had just been visiting. For at least five more years he would be in Chile, where he lived ten thousand feet up on the slopes of the Andes, mining for copper.
"So that's the story of my life," he said. Then, his eyes and voice growing deep with conviction, he added, "In about twenty-five years I'd like to be managing director." I thought that sounded nice.
HE brought his dark eyebrows together in a troubled scowl and said forebodingly, "But perhaps I won't manage it." Then, straightening his shoulders, he added resolutely, "But whatever happens I'll try to be the best mining engineer I can."
I was proud of him. I don't remember much that happened after that, except that I kept saying what luck that he had grey eyes, because I'd always loved grey eyes, and he kept looking at me and murmuring beautiful nonsense.
I had to go to the office next day, so Don came with me in the train and rang me up during the morning to tell me how much he missed me. At half past twelve he took me to lunch and gave me a book on Chile he had bought for me. During the afternoon he sent me flowers; he called at the office for me in the evening bringing along an extra suitcase he had packed at his hotel. It seemed that Mrs. Morgan had once known his mother, had said yes, of course, she was delighted he could stay a little longer.
When I told Mother and Dad that Don was coming over that evening. Dad looked up from his paper and said: "Aren't you overdoing this?'"
"He goes back to Chile in a few weeks," Mother explained.
"Oh," Dad said.
Don and I covered a lot of subjects that evening.
THINGS went on like that for several days. Then Don took me out to dinner one evening and we drove up to the pot of the hill afterwards and sat looking at the most exciting view in the world, each other.
He gripped his hands around the wheel and said: "Marriage is a serious business."
I nodded.
"It would be absolutely mad," he said almost fiercely, "to get married on the spur of the moment."
I nodded again.
"A couple shouldn't marry until they know each other well enough to be absolutely certain." I nodded once more. "Particularly," he added with emphasis, "if they're going to have to live in an isolated mining camp." I nodded vigorously.
For a moment he stared into space. "So will you marry me and come back to Chile with me?"
"Of course," I said. .
I was really sorry for Mother and Dad. They just came apart.
Dad, who is the most indulgent parent in the world, banged his hand down hard on a table top and shouted, "I forbid it!"
Mother, who usually has herself well reined in, began to wring her hands and look hysterical.
"You like him, don't you?" I asked gently.
"I don't know him!" Father roared.
We had session after session, with and without Don, in which they pointed out all the hazards. They were perfectly right, and I shivered whenever I could spare a moment from being happy.
Dad argued that? Mother and I could try to manage a trip to Chile the next winter, which would be summer there, and if I found I still wanted to marry Don he wouldn't raise any objections. That sounded sensible, but suppose some other girl caught him in the meantime?
Don was so nice about it all. He apologized in general, brought Mother flowers, and promised again and again to take great care of me.
Dad found a friend who had a friend who knew someone in the mining company, and a cable went off to South America. When the answer came it was one of those 'the young man may well go far' sort of things.
In an effort to speed up our acquaintance, Don and I tried to stop kissing each other and exchange pertinent information whenever we were alone. He told me that he had a kind disposition, liked people, needed a lot of sleep and broke out in a rash whenever he ate strawberries.
"But you must have some faults," I insisted. "Real ones."
He thought for quite a while. Then he grinned and held out his arms, and I flew into them. Chile? I would have followed him to the Antarctic.
I told him that 1 loved surprises, was often cross before breakfast and couldn't bear to sleep in a room that was totally dark.
I DID not tell him that I almost hated my cousin Ruth, for I was ashamed of it. Ruth is two years older than I am, and has always been several jumps ahead of me in everything-in fact, I never have caught up with her.
It wasn't that she was ever unkind or superior. On the contrary, she did her best to be nice to me, but I was just plain jealous.
Now there were only fifteen days left before Don was due to leave and it took three of them to pry Mother and Dad loose from their long held conviction that before people decide to get married they should know each other for at least six months. Once over that hurdle, we took the next step forward into chaos.
There was the matter of a passport; vaccination, injections, plane reservations. There was the fact that I would be going into winter weather and would need winter clothes. And of what did a mining camp ward robe consist, anyway?
There was the business of a house; which Don’s office in London agreed to provide for us, but what about furniture, linens, china and a frying pan or so?
There was, oh yes, a wedding. For years I'd dreamed about my wedding and now I hardly had time to consider it. We decided to be married in the village church, with a small reception at the house afterwards for a few friends.
WE have a large family, most of whom live near enough to rally round in a crisis. Their reactions were emphatic and mixed. Don smiled his easy, friendly smile and they thought he was charming. But when it came to marriage.
Uncle Arthur Hill, who likes to sneak off for an afternoon at the races if he can conceal it from his wife, Father's sister, Aunt Enid, said he was glad to see that there was a little sporting blood in the family after all.
Father's Aunt Emily, the nearest we can come to a dowager, was not at all amused.
Mother's sister, Aunt Jessica, was fluttery about it. Father's sister, Aunt Sue, was as usual unperturbed. Mother's brother, Uncle Howard, and his wife Jane, shook their heads.
The younger generation took it more in their stride. Ruth kissed me with warm affection and said she hoped I'd be very, very happy. The Hill twins sighed with envy and approval. Each twin has short fair. hair, a warm pink skin and good legs when wearing shorts. And my brother, Larry, who is twelve, announced that he didn't mind.
It remained for Grandmother to sum up the situation with her usual common sense and forthright manner.
"What do I think of it?" she said. "Well, if it works I'm in favour of it. If it doesn't, I'm not. And as I can't possibly know about that for some time to come, all I can say is that if you want me to give you a canteen of cutlery, you'd better hurry up and choose it."
Through all the hullabaloo, exciting as it was, I hadn't a chance to get to know Don any better. Whenever I had a moment I floated into his arms. He held me close and I knew how delightful it was to be in love. But in love with whom? Sometimes it would strike em that in a week or so I would be marrying an almost total stranger.
Every day Mother and I went shopping until the shops shut, and then dashed home to change because some relative or friend was giving a party for me. It was delightful to show off a fiance as attractive and friendly as Don. My ears buzzed with compliments about him. But every now and again at a party I'd think, Don, and feel bewilderingly unsure of myself. I'd look across, the room at him and watch his face.
For a moment our eyes would meet soberly as if they were asking: "Who are you?" "Do I know you?" "Can I really be essential in your life? "
Then he'd wink and smile his easy, charming smile and I'd be blissfully happy once more.
AT one family party Aunt Enid gave, while everyone was being very merry, Aunt Emily, our disapproving dowager, was sitting in a corner by herself looking exceptionally severe and just about as lonely. All of a· sudden Don walked quickly across the room, said, "Aunt Emily, I love you," and leaned over and kissed her on the cheek.
She reddened violently and exploded, "Nonsense!" but she smiled.
Everybody laughed and the party moved over to Aunt Emily's chair.
"That was a very nice thing to do," I said as soon as I had a moment alone with Don.
Instead of looking pleased, his grey eyes grew distinctly troubled.
" I'd no idea I was going to do it," he said. "Sometimes I'm impulsive."
" I'm glad," I smiled.
The time simply flew. Presents began to arrive, which later Mother would have packed and shipped. Don and I chose some furniture, a present from Dad, which would eventually be hoisted to a mountain top in Chile. Mrs. Morgan, with whom Don was staying, kept ringing Mother to tell her that she felt so responsible. My wedding dress arrived, white organza. Caterers, friends and delivery men stormed the front and back doors and the telephone rang every minute. I began to realize I was going thousands of miles from home and sometimes burst into tears.
I ASKED the twins to be my bridesmaids because they would have expired if I hadn't. I knew I ought to ask Ruth, too, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. She sent us a handsome present of crystal and came round one evening with a special gift for me, a lovely pink dressing gown. I saw she was hoping to be asked, but I couldn't do it.
I kept wishing Mother or Grandmother or someone would say: Cynthia, ask Ruth this instant. And no nonsense about it."
But never having understood how I felt, they didn’t realize I needed help. So, happy as I was, I still had my same old unworthy self on my hands. And I didn't like it.
I hardly had any time alone with Don but every night before I fell asleep I thought about him. I added up all the things I knew about him and wondered about all the things I didn't. I thought of his eyes and the line of his chin and his easy smile, and was happy.
THEN I thought: What do we know of each other, except that we are in love? Then I felt worried. Because I wanted far more than that.
With an almost un believable rush it was the day before the wedding, and Aunt Jane and Uncle Howard were having a party for the family. Because of the hot weather it was to be on the lawn.
Their lawn is meticulously groomed, with faultless turf, and a large lily pond, of which they're very proud. The preliminaries were off to a flying start with Mother and Dad only faintly hysterical because I would be leaving them the next day. The twins had climbed out of their shorts to try on their apricot coloured bridesmaids'
dresses for me, and I had found that Ruth had bought herself one very much like theirs, in lemon, hoping, I was sure, that at the last minute I would ask her to be a bridesmaid too:
Back in their shorts again, the twins were actually helping with preparations. Larry was exuberantly climbing trees, and racing with his cocker spaniel Blackie.
Aunt Emily, looking almost benign for her, was enthroned beneath the copper beech.
Don was standing near me talking to Uncle Arthur, and all at once I heard him say, "Whew, it's hot! I'd like to jump right into the middle of that pond."
"Why not?" Uncle Arthur said. "I dare you."
" Good idea. I think I will."
I turned and looked at Don. There was something in his voice and expression. I stared at him. This was interesting, potentially shattering, but interesting.
WITH that he turned and went off in a headlong rush to the pond. Only he didn't notice that Uncle Howard was walking across the lawn carrying a tray of sandwiches. Don landed in the middle of the pond, all right, but Uncle Howard, complete with eatables, landed there too.
The resultant splash sent a lively spray over Aunt Emily's lavender dress and released pandemonium.
With a wild shout of "Supplies overboard!" Larry dropped out of a tree, charged across the lawn and dashed into the pond, followed by a frenzied Blackie. The sandwiches were bobbing merrily about and Larry and Blackie, handicapped only slightly by Uncle Howard's thrashing gestures, immediately began to retrieve them, snatching at them skilfully as they floated past.
"That settles it!" Mother cried as she stood beside me. "We've been wondering what Don was really like, and now we know! He's an irresponsible idiot! Imagine. a grown man behaving like that! You're certainly not going off to South America with anyone as irresponsible as that! I'm only thankful we found out before it was too late to stop the wedding!"
Uncle Howard had already emerged from the pond and now Don followed suit. I have seldom seen my family so united in sentiment. They all looked as if they couldn't stand the sight of him. He looked crestfallen and miserable and when his eyes met mine there was something pleading and almost a little frightened in them.
When he had told me that he was impulsive he hadn't exaggerated. Probably some of his unconsidered actions turned out as felicitously as his kissing Aunt Emily, but the chances were that the majority of them landed him in, positions like this.
I stood looking at him for a minute, and then I went over and slipped my arm through his.
Ignoring the trembling of my legs and the shaking of my voice, I looked round at them all and said, " We apologize. Sooner or later everybody has an urge to do something crazy, and Don just happened to do something crazier than most. All we can say is that, in fair exchange, we give you permission to wreck our wedding party tomorrow." ..
"Here, here! "Larry shouted happily and somebody laughed.
Don turned to me and there was gratitude in his eyes, but so much more besides that I found myself catching my breath. In that long look between us we understood that we were going to be together, that from now on whatever happened we would be in it together, coming first with each other and for each other. It was the most wonderful feeling I have ever had in my life.
The tentative silence round us was broken when Ruth, in much the same tone I had used, said, "I'm glad to see you're mad enough to be one of the clan, Don. I was afraid you might be so perfect we'd never feel at home with you. But from now on we're going to treat you like one of the family, so beware."
IT was a long shot, but it worked. Somebody was laughing, and then somebody else, and the atmosphere began to Settle down to normal.
"If you’d ask Ruth to be one of the bridesmaids," Don said quietly to me, "you'd begin to get over being jealous of her."
I looked at him in amazement. In twenty-three years not even my own mother had realized how I felt about Ruth, and in a week or two, with nothing said, Don had seen.
Marriage, I thought as I nodded my head in agreement, was going to be a fascinating business. ............... the end
He had dark hair and a face that looked unbelievably handsome to my sidelong glances. He seemed about twenty-eight, was wide-shouldered and, I imagined, tall. He was tall. When he stood up, he danced first with Sally Jones and then with , Mrs, Morgan. He looked superb.
When the music stopped I saw him saying something to Mrs. Morgan and then they started across the room to me. The Morgans are newcomers who have belonged to the club for only six months, so we don't know them well, although Mother occasionally plays bridge with Mrs. Morgan.
His name, Mrs. Morgan said when she introduced us, was Donald Woodridge. He was their guest for the weekend and he would like to dance with me. He had a warm, easy smile, and standing beside him my head just reached his shoulders.
After Mrs. Morgan left us we stood there looking at each other.
Finally he said; "Well." Then he took a long, deep breath and said; "Well, well."
I don't know why he bothered to say anything else. He could do enough with that.
THEN he held out his arms and we began to dance. The later details escape me, such as where we were and whether there was a floor beneath our feet, I only knew that I was floating to the moon, falling magically in love.
At the end of the evening Don borrowed the Morgans' car and drove me home. But first we went up to the top of the hill, where you can see over the treetops, past the lights below, to the faint, glimmering outlines of London, We sat looking not at the view but at each other.
At last he took another exceedingly long breath and said, "Hallo"
I understood perfectly. . . .
The next morning about ten-thirty while I was eating a leisurely Sunday breakfast and Mother and Dad were inspecting the garden, Don appeared, He had actually grown more attractive in the few hours since I had seen him, I poured him a cup of coffee and asked him what he did.
"I’m a mining engineer," he said,
I thought that was interesting as I'd never known one before. I asked him where the mine was,
"Chile," he said.
"Chile," I, echoed happily. Then I jumped a little and cried, "Chile! But that's thousands of miles away!"
"Exactly," he said and leaned intensely across the table towards me, "and we haven't much time. I've been in England on leave and I'm due back in nineteen days."
If things had been moving rapidly before, they suddenly speeded up past an calculation. We sat staring at each other in consternation.
Then Don smiled his easy smile and said: "But don't worry, everything will work out all right."
He had taken a degree in engineering and was mad about his job. His parents had died and his nearest relative was an uncle in Birmingham, who was ill now and whom he had just been visiting. For at least five more years he would be in Chile, where he lived ten thousand feet up on the slopes of the Andes, mining for copper.
"So that's the story of my life," he said. Then, his eyes and voice growing deep with conviction, he added, "In about twenty-five years I'd like to be managing director." I thought that sounded nice.
HE brought his dark eyebrows together in a troubled scowl and said forebodingly, "But perhaps I won't manage it." Then, straightening his shoulders, he added resolutely, "But whatever happens I'll try to be the best mining engineer I can."
I was proud of him. I don't remember much that happened after that, except that I kept saying what luck that he had grey eyes, because I'd always loved grey eyes, and he kept looking at me and murmuring beautiful nonsense.
I had to go to the office next day, so Don came with me in the train and rang me up during the morning to tell me how much he missed me. At half past twelve he took me to lunch and gave me a book on Chile he had bought for me. During the afternoon he sent me flowers; he called at the office for me in the evening bringing along an extra suitcase he had packed at his hotel. It seemed that Mrs. Morgan had once known his mother, had said yes, of course, she was delighted he could stay a little longer.
When I told Mother and Dad that Don was coming over that evening. Dad looked up from his paper and said: "Aren't you overdoing this?'"
"He goes back to Chile in a few weeks," Mother explained.
"Oh," Dad said.
Don and I covered a lot of subjects that evening.
THINGS went on like that for several days. Then Don took me out to dinner one evening and we drove up to the pot of the hill afterwards and sat looking at the most exciting view in the world, each other.
He gripped his hands around the wheel and said: "Marriage is a serious business."
I nodded.
"It would be absolutely mad," he said almost fiercely, "to get married on the spur of the moment."
I nodded again.
"A couple shouldn't marry until they know each other well enough to be absolutely certain." I nodded once more. "Particularly," he added with emphasis, "if they're going to have to live in an isolated mining camp." I nodded vigorously.
For a moment he stared into space. "So will you marry me and come back to Chile with me?"
"Of course," I said. .
I was really sorry for Mother and Dad. They just came apart.
Dad, who is the most indulgent parent in the world, banged his hand down hard on a table top and shouted, "I forbid it!"
Mother, who usually has herself well reined in, began to wring her hands and look hysterical.
"You like him, don't you?" I asked gently.
"I don't know him!" Father roared.
We had session after session, with and without Don, in which they pointed out all the hazards. They were perfectly right, and I shivered whenever I could spare a moment from being happy.
Dad argued that? Mother and I could try to manage a trip to Chile the next winter, which would be summer there, and if I found I still wanted to marry Don he wouldn't raise any objections. That sounded sensible, but suppose some other girl caught him in the meantime?
Don was so nice about it all. He apologized in general, brought Mother flowers, and promised again and again to take great care of me.
Dad found a friend who had a friend who knew someone in the mining company, and a cable went off to South America. When the answer came it was one of those 'the young man may well go far' sort of things.
In an effort to speed up our acquaintance, Don and I tried to stop kissing each other and exchange pertinent information whenever we were alone. He told me that he had a kind disposition, liked people, needed a lot of sleep and broke out in a rash whenever he ate strawberries.
"But you must have some faults," I insisted. "Real ones."
He thought for quite a while. Then he grinned and held out his arms, and I flew into them. Chile? I would have followed him to the Antarctic.
I told him that 1 loved surprises, was often cross before breakfast and couldn't bear to sleep in a room that was totally dark.
I DID not tell him that I almost hated my cousin Ruth, for I was ashamed of it. Ruth is two years older than I am, and has always been several jumps ahead of me in everything-in fact, I never have caught up with her.
It wasn't that she was ever unkind or superior. On the contrary, she did her best to be nice to me, but I was just plain jealous.
Now there were only fifteen days left before Don was due to leave and it took three of them to pry Mother and Dad loose from their long held conviction that before people decide to get married they should know each other for at least six months. Once over that hurdle, we took the next step forward into chaos.
There was the matter of a passport; vaccination, injections, plane reservations. There was the fact that I would be going into winter weather and would need winter clothes. And of what did a mining camp ward robe consist, anyway?
There was the business of a house; which Don’s office in London agreed to provide for us, but what about furniture, linens, china and a frying pan or so?
There was, oh yes, a wedding. For years I'd dreamed about my wedding and now I hardly had time to consider it. We decided to be married in the village church, with a small reception at the house afterwards for a few friends.
WE have a large family, most of whom live near enough to rally round in a crisis. Their reactions were emphatic and mixed. Don smiled his easy, friendly smile and they thought he was charming. But when it came to marriage.
Uncle Arthur Hill, who likes to sneak off for an afternoon at the races if he can conceal it from his wife, Father's sister, Aunt Enid, said he was glad to see that there was a little sporting blood in the family after all.
Father's Aunt Emily, the nearest we can come to a dowager, was not at all amused.
Mother's sister, Aunt Jessica, was fluttery about it. Father's sister, Aunt Sue, was as usual unperturbed. Mother's brother, Uncle Howard, and his wife Jane, shook their heads.
The younger generation took it more in their stride. Ruth kissed me with warm affection and said she hoped I'd be very, very happy. The Hill twins sighed with envy and approval. Each twin has short fair. hair, a warm pink skin and good legs when wearing shorts. And my brother, Larry, who is twelve, announced that he didn't mind.
It remained for Grandmother to sum up the situation with her usual common sense and forthright manner.
"What do I think of it?" she said. "Well, if it works I'm in favour of it. If it doesn't, I'm not. And as I can't possibly know about that for some time to come, all I can say is that if you want me to give you a canteen of cutlery, you'd better hurry up and choose it."
Through all the hullabaloo, exciting as it was, I hadn't a chance to get to know Don any better. Whenever I had a moment I floated into his arms. He held me close and I knew how delightful it was to be in love. But in love with whom? Sometimes it would strike em that in a week or so I would be marrying an almost total stranger.
Every day Mother and I went shopping until the shops shut, and then dashed home to change because some relative or friend was giving a party for me. It was delightful to show off a fiance as attractive and friendly as Don. My ears buzzed with compliments about him. But every now and again at a party I'd think, Don, and feel bewilderingly unsure of myself. I'd look across, the room at him and watch his face.
For a moment our eyes would meet soberly as if they were asking: "Who are you?" "Do I know you?" "Can I really be essential in your life? "
Then he'd wink and smile his easy, charming smile and I'd be blissfully happy once more.
AT one family party Aunt Enid gave, while everyone was being very merry, Aunt Emily, our disapproving dowager, was sitting in a corner by herself looking exceptionally severe and just about as lonely. All of a· sudden Don walked quickly across the room, said, "Aunt Emily, I love you," and leaned over and kissed her on the cheek.
She reddened violently and exploded, "Nonsense!" but she smiled.
Everybody laughed and the party moved over to Aunt Emily's chair.
"That was a very nice thing to do," I said as soon as I had a moment alone with Don.
Instead of looking pleased, his grey eyes grew distinctly troubled.
" I'd no idea I was going to do it," he said. "Sometimes I'm impulsive."
" I'm glad," I smiled.
The time simply flew. Presents began to arrive, which later Mother would have packed and shipped. Don and I chose some furniture, a present from Dad, which would eventually be hoisted to a mountain top in Chile. Mrs. Morgan, with whom Don was staying, kept ringing Mother to tell her that she felt so responsible. My wedding dress arrived, white organza. Caterers, friends and delivery men stormed the front and back doors and the telephone rang every minute. I began to realize I was going thousands of miles from home and sometimes burst into tears.
I ASKED the twins to be my bridesmaids because they would have expired if I hadn't. I knew I ought to ask Ruth, too, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. She sent us a handsome present of crystal and came round one evening with a special gift for me, a lovely pink dressing gown. I saw she was hoping to be asked, but I couldn't do it.
I kept wishing Mother or Grandmother or someone would say: Cynthia, ask Ruth this instant. And no nonsense about it."
But never having understood how I felt, they didn’t realize I needed help. So, happy as I was, I still had my same old unworthy self on my hands. And I didn't like it.
I hardly had any time alone with Don but every night before I fell asleep I thought about him. I added up all the things I knew about him and wondered about all the things I didn't. I thought of his eyes and the line of his chin and his easy smile, and was happy.
THEN I thought: What do we know of each other, except that we are in love? Then I felt worried. Because I wanted far more than that.
With an almost un believable rush it was the day before the wedding, and Aunt Jane and Uncle Howard were having a party for the family. Because of the hot weather it was to be on the lawn.
Their lawn is meticulously groomed, with faultless turf, and a large lily pond, of which they're very proud. The preliminaries were off to a flying start with Mother and Dad only faintly hysterical because I would be leaving them the next day. The twins had climbed out of their shorts to try on their apricot coloured bridesmaids'
dresses for me, and I had found that Ruth had bought herself one very much like theirs, in lemon, hoping, I was sure, that at the last minute I would ask her to be a bridesmaid too:
Back in their shorts again, the twins were actually helping with preparations. Larry was exuberantly climbing trees, and racing with his cocker spaniel Blackie.
Aunt Emily, looking almost benign for her, was enthroned beneath the copper beech.
Don was standing near me talking to Uncle Arthur, and all at once I heard him say, "Whew, it's hot! I'd like to jump right into the middle of that pond."
"Why not?" Uncle Arthur said. "I dare you."
" Good idea. I think I will."
I turned and looked at Don. There was something in his voice and expression. I stared at him. This was interesting, potentially shattering, but interesting.
WITH that he turned and went off in a headlong rush to the pond. Only he didn't notice that Uncle Howard was walking across the lawn carrying a tray of sandwiches. Don landed in the middle of the pond, all right, but Uncle Howard, complete with eatables, landed there too.
The resultant splash sent a lively spray over Aunt Emily's lavender dress and released pandemonium.
With a wild shout of "Supplies overboard!" Larry dropped out of a tree, charged across the lawn and dashed into the pond, followed by a frenzied Blackie. The sandwiches were bobbing merrily about and Larry and Blackie, handicapped only slightly by Uncle Howard's thrashing gestures, immediately began to retrieve them, snatching at them skilfully as they floated past.
"That settles it!" Mother cried as she stood beside me. "We've been wondering what Don was really like, and now we know! He's an irresponsible idiot! Imagine. a grown man behaving like that! You're certainly not going off to South America with anyone as irresponsible as that! I'm only thankful we found out before it was too late to stop the wedding!"
Uncle Howard had already emerged from the pond and now Don followed suit. I have seldom seen my family so united in sentiment. They all looked as if they couldn't stand the sight of him. He looked crestfallen and miserable and when his eyes met mine there was something pleading and almost a little frightened in them.
When he had told me that he was impulsive he hadn't exaggerated. Probably some of his unconsidered actions turned out as felicitously as his kissing Aunt Emily, but the chances were that the majority of them landed him in, positions like this.
I stood looking at him for a minute, and then I went over and slipped my arm through his.
Ignoring the trembling of my legs and the shaking of my voice, I looked round at them all and said, " We apologize. Sooner or later everybody has an urge to do something crazy, and Don just happened to do something crazier than most. All we can say is that, in fair exchange, we give you permission to wreck our wedding party tomorrow." ..
"Here, here! "Larry shouted happily and somebody laughed.
Don turned to me and there was gratitude in his eyes, but so much more besides that I found myself catching my breath. In that long look between us we understood that we were going to be together, that from now on whatever happened we would be in it together, coming first with each other and for each other. It was the most wonderful feeling I have ever had in my life.
The tentative silence round us was broken when Ruth, in much the same tone I had used, said, "I'm glad to see you're mad enough to be one of the clan, Don. I was afraid you might be so perfect we'd never feel at home with you. But from now on we're going to treat you like one of the family, so beware."
IT was a long shot, but it worked. Somebody was laughing, and then somebody else, and the atmosphere began to Settle down to normal.
"If you’d ask Ruth to be one of the bridesmaids," Don said quietly to me, "you'd begin to get over being jealous of her."
I looked at him in amazement. In twenty-three years not even my own mother had realized how I felt about Ruth, and in a week or two, with nothing said, Don had seen.
Marriage, I thought as I nodded my head in agreement, was going to be a fascinating business. ............... the end
No comments:
Post a Comment